Sunday, March 2, 2008

Waiting for things to speed by like a tortoise

Thank you for your patience with my silence these last couple weeks! I am thankful to report that my talk went well, thanks to God's grace and power (as part of the internship, every intern has to give a sermon to the rest of their intern class). Even though it was a bit stressful, it was a very helpful experience. It was good to discover even more the power that is in God's word and how all parts of the Bible, even the parts where we shake our heads and get confused, have something relevant to say if you are willing to stay in the conversation.

I am still currently job searching. I had two interviews for one organization this last week and I was so excited about working for them, but then once the hours were made clear (late nights and weekends included), it was quickly apparent to me that there is no possible way to reconcile that with my internship commitments. So that was pretty disappointing and discouraging. This means that I'm still applying and looking and hoping for call backs. Job searching brings up a lot of issues for me about how much I trust God. Do I really think that God's plan will be best for me or do I want God to make MY plans come to pass? How do I pray passionately for something while at the same time acknowledging that God might have a better plan in mind that I haven't even thought of?

We are beginning to hear talk about interview weekend for those considering the Servant Partners internship for this next year, and I can hardly believe that it's that time already. How is it already March? Before I started the internship, I had a lot of expectations about how quickly I would bond with people in my neighborhood and develop transformative relationships. I didn't realize how much time and energy it takes to simply transition from living a college lifestyle to working full-time and trying to be invested in a new community while going to all these mentorship and training meetings (and job searching!). The pace of developing relationships has been a lot slower than making new friends among my college peers, when we were around each other 24/7 and had more free time. Part of me feels slightly embarrassed that a newcomer or outsider could look at me and criticize me for not having deeper relationships already. And then another part of me wonders if I'm feeling guilty for a situation that is simply the reality of how life often works. That relationships can take a long time to blossom. That it takes a lot of energy and time to make new friendships and mentor people when most of your week is devoted to working. That even if I feel small and insufficient, God is at work in Northwest Pasadena and he's been here before I got here and will be here long after I am gone, and at the heart of it, that's what matters.

Here are a couple interesting and relevant links sent to me by friends:
A video of interview snippets with local leaders in Pasadena on the challenges and characteristics of Northwest Pasadena. If you want to know more about where I'm living, check this out!

Two articles from the Economist, one on urban black flight from L.A, and one on the dispersal of Latino immigrants across the United States.

"Housework...takes many forms, depending on what is in your heart as you approach it. I personally am inclined to approach it the way governments treat dissent: ignore it until it revolts." High Tide in Tucson

1 comment:

Roi Et Mom said...

Developing new relationships in college is easier than most other settings for a couple of reasons. You have noted that college students spend more time around each other than happens in other settings. I think there is an even more important factor. Newcomers are interested in making friends. Those who have been in a place a long time are not looking for new friends. Entering college freshman are all new, so they are all looking to make friends. The population as a whole is ready to build relationships. When an adult moves to a new neighborhood, they move into a setting in which most people already have friends and usually family. Established residents are not usually closed to new relationships, but they are not seeking them. So it does take much longer for newcomers to make friends and build relationships than it did at college.